The Upwardly Mobile Harness is the merchandise arm of Nacy Warner Associates.
About our name: Remember when figure skater Adam Rippon wore that Moschino tux to the Oscars? As queens everywhere gagged, one of our creators commented, "Yeah, but it's an upwardly-mobile harness." (Why that never caught on as a thing, we'll never know.)
About our language: Yeah, we use some salty language here. If you're easily offended or don't like cuss words, then you should probably not shop here. There are a host of places on the interwebz for you to experience wholesome, Christian, lily-white online commerce.